Don't be a dummy cum on the tummy. Make her a slut, and cum in her butt. Have no fear, jizz in her ear. Don't be a noob, cum on her boob. Forget her rack, blow on her back. Just take off your coat and jizz in her throat. And if she seals off her holes, cum in her rolls
is that a poem?!
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
You FaceTimed your mom in the back of the limo telling her how many guys you hooked up with at the concert
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
Randomize
