I asked my mother if she peed on that chair, she said "not bad" There is no good level of pee on a chair.
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
Don't worry about it. I've taken so much Plan B, my uterus is purely for show now.
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
We're celebrating his weight gain and arrest.and by we I mean I, and by celebrating I mean getting dangerously drunk
okay - we take $20 and buy each other some 'drink till we puke' clothes from the thrift store.
Had a guy spin me around at the bar, kiss me then say "oh shit you're not who I thought you were" and then walk away.
I mean, I introduced myself as "the after party". I think he knew early in the night he was in for a bangathon.
We're eating jello shots in the library. I love the day after Valentine's
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
I need a hoe opinion
go on
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