wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
I just remember being in the bathroom alone cussing out the bunny
And I would just like to take the time to say my boobs look great today.
This hangover is so bad, we are pregaming Chinese food with pizza.
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
Hey the moment you step into my house, find me IMMEDIATELY so we can pinky promise on not roping anyone at the party into yet another threesome
I think people are normalizing furries
Randomize
