wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
If its vodka, everyone is attractive. Tequila, everyone is dead sexy, single and fuckable.
I swear it started with good intentions but then my slutty side took over and we started playing strip checkers
I woke up exactly where I passed out... on top of him yet he somehow put his pants back on
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
I have been way too involved with your nipples this weekend
The more and more I drink I keep rationalizing banging eye patch girl
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
My heart stopped for a sec, but I snorted what I believe was cocaine off the floor, and I'm back in the fight
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
Randomize
