OMFG I JUST SAW SOMEONE GIVING SOMEONE ELSE ROAD HEAD AND THEY HIT A POTHOLE. my day has been officially made.
wtf
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
Peach margaritas. And fuck whatever you're about to say, the girl to guy ratio is like 6:1. I need those odds
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Yeah like 200 white people came and they are playing that one Biggie Smalls song everyone knows.
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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