She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
Green mimosas i think yes
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
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