pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
The old woman next to me on the el smells like cupcakes...but she doesn't taste like cupcakes
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
