I decided you couldn't drive after you asked where the time circuits were on your Altima
I wanted to see November 5, 1985
i feel like im playing gay clue. i have to figure out where i am, who took me home, and what he put in me
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
My printer just jammed because one of the condom wrappers I threw when we had sex in my dorm
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I think I hit my head on every surface in that apartment last night
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
I actually feel bad for him. He has me as a girlfriend and he's like a saintly cleanly person... And I'm over here telling him to jizz on my back and shit.
I don't know what song to play at my bong's funeral!
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
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