all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
There was a dismembered bleeding penis in my dream last night. That's some serious Freudian shit.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I don't know which is weirder: that she was old enough to have a live-in son close to my age, or that the woman he was with was close to hers
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
Randomize
