i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
Yeah, it was perfect until the end. Apparently women are super attracted to me until the sleeping with part.
get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
You stuck your entire fist into a full jar of peanut butter and starting assaulting people
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Randomize
