My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
my mom sold the house because of the grow room the couple saw i had in the basement.
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
I also have to vacuum the broken noodles out of my suitcase...
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
I also woke up in a guys bed in a Reptar shirt yesterday morning staring at a movie theater sized poster of the not as popular Air Bud franchise movie Super Buddies.
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
Randomize