discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Day two of vacation and my first drink of the day is a plan b colada
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
She was from Wisconsin, she had great boobs... I mean... It's a dairy state....
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize
