Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
He put my hand on his penis and said welcome home.
Oh and apparently Friday night I came home and tried assembling the Christmas tree until my mom just told me to go to bed. Blackout.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
I would rather suck a dick or two than go there
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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