Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
I remembered to bring wine in a nalgene bottle, but I forgot sunscreen and water. I'm starting to question my life decisions.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
I just made my roommate a 'Hope you don't have chlamydia' cake.
Make one for john too.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Also my bed has glitter in it for reasons I do not recall
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
Randomize
