i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
First date: that requires underwear, huh?
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
I need to shotgun another beer. Where's the machete?
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
every day is bullshit and fuck everyone. That's my motto for the week
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
