I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
No more Irish car bombs ever.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
Tried to dry my shoes in the oven last night.
He's the second guy this morning whose job is jeopardized because of my vagina.
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
Randomize
