I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
Oh my God. He stopped counting at 22.. His senior year. I feel the STDs infecting my taint as we speak.
Someone please drive out to my house to bring me a beer.. There are some in the fridge but I just can't get up
I have family pictures in an hour and a half and I'm 9 beers deep. This is how I get written out of my grandparents will...
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
Woke up naked on your sister's mattress lying next to a single slice of bread.
This power is too much for most humans to handle safely. It's like having the nuclear launch codes, except it's my penis.
In tonight's episode of Travis' Fucked up Sex Life, Travis breaks into a building at Tulane to have sex with an attractive Asian man.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
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