You really coming over, don't trick.
Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
She said her name is "Goose" and regardless of her being a lesbian, sometimes she just "needs a good dick"
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
So I came to the conclusion that who ever pour my ever clear out saved my life
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