Just saw a midget shotgun a coors light
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
i feel like i want to date him just so i could be besties with his penis
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also one of my neighbors is blasting "pumped up kicks" and possibly butchering some chickens
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
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