Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Just got walked in on during safety inspections
Think you passed?
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I repeat do not go to a jail visit drunk, those stools are easy to fall off.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
Randomize
