Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
is there any particular reason you took a shit in a zip lock bag and left it in my refrigerator?
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Dude a guy just showed up with alcohol and a bag of double cheese burgers. I think I found my future husband.
So after we got done with our cardiac arrest patient, I thought how awesome would it be to hook up the defibrillator pads to cook a burrito.
dude... how have they not drug tested you yet?
I heard from anne today. She has a broken collarbone and is knocked up. Apparently florida is awesome
Hes laying on the floorn in the bathroom telling Jesus to raise the flag
Just did ten shots in 8.34 minutes........ Slowly getting over the loss
The used rubbers I threw behind her bed all semester must have landed on the baseboard heater. They went up in smoke when she turned on the heat last night.
Jacked up my neck and shoulder hanging on for dear life while I rode him like a boss. Plus my house smells like broccoli, bad! How's YOUR morning?
I am about to embark upon a south Boston wedding....
Hydrate.
He would come to class in wrapped in nothing but a pink towel
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
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