When I woke up his cat was sleeping on my face and i had scratch marks on my neck. not happy.
only room for one pussy in that bed.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
We picked up some guys dressed as shamrocks at taco bell. I will text you with further information.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Why we can't turn this into a healthy friendship where I cheat on my boyfriend with you and you feel better knowing everything wrong with my life is beyond me.
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I guess that means I was blowing a nerd last week.
And loving it.
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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