yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
There's limited edition cherry vanilla nyquil. It's like they know how much I hate myself and they're giving me a consolation prize.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
There's something really special about 3:00 in the afternoon drunk that just can't be duplicated at any other time of day.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
That's why you bone lesbian cage fighters and 45 year olds. To make life less boring.
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Nothing says "we're never gonna bone" like "nice haircut, it makes you look like my cousin"
So, anyways, aside from wanting to seduce my roommate for booze, how's everything been
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
Randomize
