it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
On a scale of one to Chris Brown, how angry are you?
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic