in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I knew I wanted to marry her when we got in that bar fight and she full-nelsoned a guy while I worked his kidneys. I knew then we had to breed
we f'd six times
f'd?
its sunday, i cant say fucked
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
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