Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Ill try not let guys feel my boobs for free drinks next time, no promises tho. I am my boyfriends worst nightmare.
Our entire day shift is on either molly or acid. I'm about to take two hits of the latter.
I would let him fuck me right here in this laundromat. Praise Satan.
Randomize
