Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
Can we go out and get blitzed in celebration that they'll be no more surprise kids
Sundays were made for eating Ramen pantless in bed.
Randomize