I don't know if you realize how depressing it is to get your card denied....when you're only spending $4.
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
I DON'T CARE WHAT THE CIRCUMSTANCES ARE NEVER VOMIT IN MY PURSE AGAIN.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
The last good decent convo we has was when I was trying to convince you to let me watch you pee.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
I look like a hot mess, emphasis on the hot now, more emphasis on the mess later
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
