I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Someone just asked if you were the one who rode around the bar on some girls back
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
I'm still not sure how to feel about the fact that we had a threesome with a guy the same age as my dad
Yeah but who says we can't be shitfaced and tan at the same time?
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
Put on your bikini and meet me at the pool \nit’s cock o’clock!
Randomize
