i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
You surviving the open bar?
Super asto ex polenta omaha botad
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
I just spent 20 minutes in a Subway trying to take a candid photo of the doppleganger of the guy I lost my virginity to instead of eating. That's all the evidence I need that my life is on track.
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
You know your acid trip is going well when the orange you're eating gives you a life lesson
My life hurts
I woke up 30 minutes away from the bar, my car was at a train station, and when I got home all I got was the speechless head shake
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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