This girl is very crazy
She's one of those compassionate ppl
So everything I said on this seemingly endless date offended her
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
He cut you off when you said Paula Dean was in your soul...He kicked you out when "Paula" started eating random peoples food
He suggested abortion before I finished the sentence. That was my plan too, but now I feel like should keep it just to prove how big of a dick he is.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
Oh you're gonna love this story. I almost cut off a little girl's pony tail.
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Just so you know, my new pet parrot tried to bond sexually with me today. That is what Google told me. I'm not sure of its gender.
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
You can't go around chasing people and screaming JUST LET ME LOVE YOU. We're in a public place.
There is a dude with blue hair and a samurai sword and another dude dressed as Dead Pool. I daresay standard social conventions are not applicable in this environment.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
Randomize
