Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
it was surprisingly calming to be rocked to sleep by his roommate humping on the bottom bunk
I think the duck is in my room. You have no idea how much worse a duck makes a hangover
Sometimes I wish I could open my skin and just take a little peek at my liver. You know, just to see if it's rotten yet or still perfect looking.
I knew my sign language would come in handy. I just used sign to coordinate a coke deal.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
It was great. Somehow, sleeping with her sister cured everything!
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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