We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Are u guys proud? I puked my brains out last night at a strip club. While my two fave strippèrs held my hair
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
Very unfortunate to find out the kid who took your virginity has never seen Star Wars🙃
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
dude, next time you say lets go on an adventure, tell me if there are going to be psychotrophics involved before hand.
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
Randomize
