Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
officially christened the dorm room by sucking my spilled drink off the floor. tastes like homee
TO ALL WHO WERE IN MY HOUSE LAST NIGHT: WHOEVER STOLE MY BONG AND PUT IT ON THE ROOF WILL BE PAYING MY HOSPITAL BILL FROM LAST NIGHT.. AND BUYING ME A NEW, SWEETER BONG.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
I just bought 7 working mopeds off a guy for $300. We are 60% of the way to our gay biker gang dream.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize