Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
The walk of shame is slightly more complicated when you wake up in the wrong country...
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
Please don't be alarmed by the blood on my arms and phone in the morning. It's not mine.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
Drunk me just left a note for sober me apologizing for all the fucking crumbs in our bed
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
I'll give you some leg action but I'm not showing you anything else until your penis admits it loves me
Randomize