I'd rather drink alone in my closet than hang out with that girl
I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
I feel uncomfortable when she gargles my jizz.
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
we boned then he told me that he had a thing for my gay roommate. worst night ever
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Last thing I remember is Dusty riding the bikes we "borrowed" from the hotel through the CVS while the rest of us picked up the girls who were laughing at him
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
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