Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
they bet me shots that I couldn't give people piggyback rides around the club just cause I'm 125lbs and a girl...I had a line forming after the third guy.
You owe me $8 for the carwash I needed after you threw the salmon on my windshield.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
It's really funny to see the look on the sales lady's face when she asks why you're replacing a painting. "I knocked it off the wall during sex w/ my heels," wasn't what she expected.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I'm totally going to bang the cable guy tonight. I'm so pumped
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
just woke up with a trucker hat, half a grilled cheese, and popcorn spread everywhere. last night must have been good.
Randomize