My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
i actually have a tan line from him holding my boob while we were sunbathing
Passed out on her toilet. Dog licked my face to wake me. Awkward talk with her boyfriend, who hadn't been home last night. Not sure exactly what town I'm in, but I'm south. Will call for ride when I figure it out.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
You know I base where I go on the likelihood of me getting laid there. This includes work.
SUFFER THE WRATH OF THE PISS BAG
Randomize
