my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
I felt so bad for you. Drunk Rachael wanted nothing more than to crawl into the cop car and give you a hug. Luckily Mollied/Barred out Rachael convinced Drunk Rachael this was a terrible idea. So I ran. I have your keys btw
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
It's not a real holiday until someone pees on you. Did someone pee on you?
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
My dad just saw me take dirty one night stand underwear out of my purse. I'm willing to admit I have a problem
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
Woke up with two different pairs of pants in the pockets of a jacket.None of the above are mine.
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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