You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! I saw hookers! Live in the flesh!
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
How the hell am I supposed to know what lotion to get her? They should have a dressing booth where I could go test how good it is for jerking off, then I'd know.
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
Some guy seriously just got Jimmy Johns delivered to him at the graduation ceremony. This cannot be real life.
.......The other day I peed on him in the shower....he was trying to touch my boobs and I wanted my space.
Good morning sunshine. Care to hear the riveting tale of Michelle and the Almost Great Night That Ended In An Early Morning of Karma Emptying It's Bowels On Her Guilty Shoulders?
It is completely possible to eat beef jerky sexually.
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
The only people who really get me are strippers and mascots for sports teams.
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
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