I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
i just jacked off to lindsey vonn, i feel so patriotic
USA! USA! USA!
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
At the gym and this really hot trainer checked me out and was talking to his buddy about his workout. He then says "yeah man, like I'm doing so many reps- what's 7 times 7, 45?"
He was THIS close.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my boss that I'm in a slutty stage of my life right now and the chef overheard and slipped me his number. I might get laid tonight
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
I'm not sure if 14 year old me would be disappointed or proud that I fucked him behind her middle school??
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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