My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
i wonder if she gts uncomfortable walkin bu when she knows we all know what her pussy tastes like
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
You will never know an awkward moment until your parents pick you up from a one night stand.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
I may or may not vaguely recall punching you in the dick but it was a misunderstanding and I forgive you can we have make up sex?
I used the phrase "love child of quasimodo and cyclops " in a sentence today.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
