ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
Someone sharpied 'shit show' on my tits. Someone with excellent penmanship
his dad told me thanks for making his little boy a man at breakfast this morning
All I remember was the chick screaming "don't hookup with him! His dick's the size of a cucumber"
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
I really like her...she always overpays me for xanax and still feels the need to fuck me to make up for it....
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
Randomize
