Bitch is talking to much, howd u ever get her 2 shut up?
It's worth it.
How worth it?
Back door worth it
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Oh, don't even get me started. Harry Potter is so pure. Twilight is just teenage girl porn.
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Hold on, I gotta pump breast milk for the white russians.
Today is leap day..... If that's not an excuse to blackout all day I don't know what is
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
30% sure Kevin and I just adopted a cat. Talk to me when the sun's up but I really feel like that's a thing.
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
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