Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I should probably stop opening conversations with 'guess who's horny'.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
