I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
we made margaritas with slurpies from 7-11 and beer.
i wanted to go smoke pot, so i told my mom i was getting tutored. she asked what time i would be back, i told her learning doesn't have a curfew
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Lab coat again saves the day - hiding embarrassing shart evidence...
It's truly amazing how much porn I can get in while my phones at 1% battery life.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
I'm hoarding IKEA meatballs in my purse
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
It probably doesn't matter because I'm drunk...but I'm sorry for getting you drunk, having you almost lose your place to live, all your friends, permanently lose your liver functions, throwing up on my floor, losing virginity...etc...mostly I'm sorry for making you watch: cabin in the woods.
Randomize
