He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
the bride spent most of the night apologizing to people she had punched earlier.
In reality u ask do u have beer at your house but what your really saying is will there be cock in my mouth
Doing lines off a plate that says, "things go better with coke."
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
we got kicked out of her coke dealer's house when we wouldn't stop quoting "a league of their own"
communist
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
She played the piano. I played the piano. She got on top of the piano. I got on top of her.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
