What started out as Cougar hunting turned into whaling
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
We asked an illegal alien to buy us beer. He didn't even want a tip. I'm going to Washington to plead that case.
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Smoked a joint and chugged some pepto. Feeling a lil better... Not sure which is working..... Gonna keep doing both.....
he was cumming and all I could think about was the pathway of sperm the in penis. thanks a lot nursing
We woke up in the room with a hamburger patty on the bed side table, one bun across the room, and the other bun under my pillow. Still don't know who ordered room service.
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
He tried to do the do on me last night and my exact words were "stay away from my princess parts. they're renovating."
How was your night?
I spent a lot of money and drank a lot of booze. Also was part of a successful search party
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
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