That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
The sex was so good, I called my ex during the 2nd time just so he could hear. Is that mean?
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
Someone tried to flush pizza down the toilet. Well, at least tried to
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
I feel like I got hit by a truck. And I vaguely remember getting into an argument with a passive aggressive Ron Burgundy in a onesie- grown man, not a baby- about the pronunciation of New Orleans
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
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