i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
literally hosing herself off in my back yard with the hose. i offered her the shower but she refused. that drunk.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I may or may not have puked in the ladies room. Now I get to convince my client to go to substance abuse treatment. Oh, the irony.
HE ASKED IF I HAD SIBLINGS WHEN I ASKED HIM TO LICK MY ASSHOLE
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
Sometimes at I wake up from a dead sleep at 1am and call the bar just to hear the clink of the glasses and the pouring of the beer on tap in the backround
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
Randomize
