Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
Let's review the facts-we're bored, we have a ton of beer, and we live 5 minutes from the zoo. This equation is easily solvable
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
I hope you don't have to start the day explaining to me how you failed to turn "Can I practice my belly dancing in your apartment" into all night sex.
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
I'm sorry I murdered your sperm with my alcohol saturated Olympic uterus.
this is getting really bad. i thought the chandelier in the dining room was one of those claws from the claw games in an arcade and i spent the past five minutes jumping left to right so the claw wouldn't grab me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
Listen. I don't care if its "nontoxic" im not putting it in my fucking vagina.
What kind of costume was that supposed to be??
I'm an orgasm trader!
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
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