im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
Could you explain why there is an Australian passport in your toilet?
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
theyll ask where you are and ill say on a date crying in a sombrero
like that time i did too much ghb at gay pride
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
The nursing school interview showed me a picture of my passed out during your party. They asked if this was a frquent thing. I told them you drugged me.
I would not be watching the debate if there wasn't drinking involved. Let's be honest.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I JUST MADE OUT WITH A BRITISH SOCCER PLAYER. LONG LIVE THE QUEEN. GOD BLESS THAT COUNTRY.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
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